How to do mindfulness and meditation

It means anchoring your attention on a specific feeling at the moment, and pulling it back without judgment when your mind wanders, that's all.

I fell into a big trap when I first started practicing. I saved up half a month’s salary to buy special meditation mats and scented candles. I set an alarm clock for 20 minutes every day to force myself to “empty”. As a result, the more I sat, the more irritated I became. My mind was occupied with my to-do list, and I blamed myself for my lack of talent. Later, I followed After chatting with a senior who has been practicing for almost ten years, I realized that there is no so-called "correct state". Even if you focus on the temperature of the cup in your hand and smell the aroma of baking while queuing up to buy coffee, even if it is only for 10 seconds, it is an effective mindfulness practice.

However, there has been a lot of controversy in the circle about the practice method. Many people who are deeply involved in the traditional practice system feel that this fragmented practice is "not orthodox enough". It must be taught by a teacher, follow a fixed ritual, sit for at least 40 minutes a day, and even retreat regularly. It is not wrong to say that you can touch the real threshold. If you are pursuing a deeper exploration of consciousness, then systematic long-term training is definitely necessary. But for most ordinary people who just want to relieve anxiety and improve emotional stability, there is no need to be so complicated. If you have severe emotional distress and want to practice at a clinical level, the 8-week mindfulness-based stress reduction therapy (MBSR), which is currently proven to have a lot of evidence, will be more suitable. However, you will have to follow the certified instructor system, which is not the same as daily fragmented practice.

To put it bluntly, this is "attention muscle training" for the brain. Just think of your attention as the little corgi you raise at home. It's normal for it to run away to sniff the wild flowers on the roadside and chase passing cats. You don't need to scold it for "why it's running around and not being obedient at all". Just gently pull off the leash and bring it back. The more times it is used, the more it will naturally get used to staying by your side and won't run away at every turn.

I used to have a friend who was an Internet operator, and she had to stay up for more than half a month during June 18 and Double 11 every year. She couldn't help but lose her temper with the children in the team, and she felt so guilty that she couldn't sleep after she lost her temper. Later, she set a rule for herself. Every time she felt her chest was tight and her anger was rising, she would stop first. Take three deep breaths, and focus on feeling the airflow through your nose, ups and downs in your chest, and out through your mouth. It’s just a small movement of a few seconds. She told me last month that she didn’t blush during the recent big sales, and even after staying up late, she wasn’t as depressed as she was before.

Of course, many people now say that mindfulness meditation is an IQ tax. This complaint is not unreasonable. Nowadays, many businesses package it as a "miraculous medicine" that can solve all problems. They boast that practicing it can make millions a month and can cure depression. On the contrary, it has covered up its original function. To put it bluntly, it is a tool for regulating emotions. It is no different from running or writing an emotional diary. It is useful but not omnipotent. There is no need to deify it or deliberately belittle it.

If you are free now and want to give it a try, you don’t have to buy thousands of courses. You can stop and touch the phone or keyboard in your hand now to feel its temperature and the touch of the casing. It doesn’t matter if your mind wanders, just gently bring your attention back. This is your first effective mindfulness practice. Isn’t it much simpler than you think?